Thank you very much. Honored guests, fellow citizens, this evening, our home is chaos. Schools have been canceled, winds have been gusting, and the civilized world faces unprecedented dangers. Yet, the state of the Morgan's has never been stronger (Applause). As I blog, children are jumping on beds when they should be brushing their teeth. Other children are pounding on their brothers doors when they are trying to clean their rooms, but our resolve is strong. We will stay the course. The teeth will get brushed and the rooms will be clean, no matter the cost (Applause).
The lure of the Wii is apparent. When the snow flies, and there is no school, there are few interesting options for civilians. However, we will smoke all children out of their video game holes and prevail (Applause). 
Times are bleak. External forces (gusty winds) prevent Pete from going to "project know" tonight. I propose more extensive legislature in the "No fifth grader left behind in sex education" act. No child should go without seeing the boring video showing how puberty affects the adolescent body. That is the right of all (Applause)!
In closing, my two-year-old is completely naked, I think she wants a bath. Bobby is in Florida on a business trip and I don't know what to make for dinner. We might have to add to the deficit, stimulate the economy, and order a pizza. God bless, thank you, and goodnight (Applause).
2 comments:
I thought that was always the dinner of choice when dad is out of town! That's what we get.
I don't envy you. You are a busy, busy woman!
you're too funny! No snow day here. VERY cold and windy though.
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